So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
