My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
wakey wakey hands off snakey
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
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