when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
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