I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
