you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Randomize
