Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Randomize
