I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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