Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize
