Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
