jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
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By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
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He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
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