Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
It's shark week go big or go home
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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