I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
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