I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
