I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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