i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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