No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
