She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
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I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
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