I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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