Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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