just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
