I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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