That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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