did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Randomize
