Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Randomize
