If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Actions speak louder than pants.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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