my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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