So drunk its hurt
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
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the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
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You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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