do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
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