if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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