I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Randomize
