i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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