I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
