Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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