well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Randomize
