She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
