I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Randomize
