I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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