Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
I smell like Dick and happiness
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Randomize
