The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Just puked most of my soul out..
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize