you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
