We're facebook friends in real life
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Randomize
