i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize