I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Randomize
