You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
