I'm sorry my penis didn't work
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
he puts the penis in happiness.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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