i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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