We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize