I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
