Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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