I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
